Hey there!
I'm Mara Glatzel.
My pronouns are she/her.
Welcome to my corner of the internet.
I want you to know that even if right now you feel like it is impossible, there is a reality in which you can live a full and meaningful life, and meet your needs.
I get how far away that might feel, but before you turn your back on this possibility, play along with me here for a moment.
So many of us (myself included) have spent years tying ourselves up in knots and over-delivering in an attempt to earn the deep acceptance we’re hungry for.
We’ve found ourselves feeling pissed off (again) because our boundaries have been trampled on (again). And yet, many of us continue to resist asking for help because we don’t want anyone to judge us for struggling. (And if we’re being honest, sometimes we think we’re the only ones who can pull it all off as well as we do).
Can you relate? I certainly can.
In our modern society, we learn that our role is to say yes to literally everything, even when we want to desperately say no. We are taught, often from a young age, to criticize our lack of productivity. We wind up believing that our worth is contingent on what we DO instead of who we ARE.
We learn it’s our job to take responsibility for other people’s emotions, and somehow that ours don’t matter. Even more than that, we’ve spent our lives being told that somehow being “needy” means we’re weak, burdensome, and unloveable.
If this feels heavy, or hits a little close to home, take a deep breath.
If this resonates with you, and you see your own experience in these words, be gentle with yourself in this moment.
If everything in you is screaming that you’re too burnt out, exhausted, and overburdened to figure out a way out of this mess… I want you to know, I see you.
And my work is for you.
And we can be in this together, one step at a time.
This is not your fault. You are not bad or wrong or failing.
Let’s name the elephant in the room, shall we?
The capitalist patriarchal society that we live in keeps us in a state of perpetual exhaustion, trying to be everything to everyone. And, at the same time, it blames us for not doing a good enough job of keeping up.
White supremacy teaches us that there is one ideal version of perfection and that we must continually strive for it in order to earn our worth, goodness, and safety. It teaches us that there is a direct link between how our bodies look, and how worthy we are. And, as many of us are heartbroken to find out, that target is continually out of reach by design.
It’s not your fault that you feel like you’re barely treading water. We live in a system that wasn’t designed to support our very human, and very valid, needs.
I’m here to walk the path of figuring out how to more lovingly tend to ourselves, within a culture rooted in toxic productivity. And I’m committed to helping you do that in a way that brings a great deal of compassion to all that you’ve tried up to this point.
this is me
I am a White, fat, queer, middle-income femme mother of two young kids + a rambunctious inner landscape. I’m a recovering control freak + human who deeply understands the impulse to relegate her needs to the bottom of a very long to-do list in an attempt to prove her worth.
With gratitude, I live and work upon unceded homelands of the Wampanoag Nation, People of the First Light, in North Truro near the tip of Cape Cod on the lands of the historic Paomet Wampanoag tribal village.
I quite literally wrote the book on needs. It’s called Needy: How to Advocate for Your Needs and Claim Your Sovereignty + you can buy it right here.
I am not even slightly interested in one size fits all “self-care” that continually misses the mark.
I am ecstatic about helping perfectionists and people pleasers take up space in their lives and reclaim their sovereignty through honoring and advocating for their needs.
I offer workshops, courses + retreats that help you grow from self-abandonment to self-partnership, but really I create opportunities for you to feel seen, heard + held, as you are, right now. #zeroimprovementsneeded
In other fun news, I’m an ambivert, which means when I’m home I never want to leave + when I’m at a party you’ll find me hugging everyone repeatedly + talking way too much while I gesticulate wildly.
I have a “thing” about things being “just so.” This means I will bend over backwards to find the perfect mug, font, or planner and could wait a million and a half years for the EXACT thing I am craving without any desire for a lesser version.
(Dark chocolate & sea salt donut from Holy Donuts in Portland, ME anyone?)
I am a pisces with libra moon and libra rising, which means that I’m wildly sensitive, pragmatically luxurious, and obsessively imaginative.
I have an incredible knack for delivering a stellar peptalk entirely through memes. Find me on instagram to soak up some of that goodness.
I received my Masters in Clinical Social Work in 2012 with a specialization in Trauma & Interpersonal Violence. I am certified in the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) level 1, Reiki level 1, and the Crystalline Consciousness Technique (CCT) levels 1 – 4.
I have been walking this path for as long as I can remember, and have supported thousands of humans along the way. I am not here to fix or empower you. I am here to hold space for you as you learn how to tend to, adore + empower yourself.
>> looking for my official bio + media photos? Skip on over here
you + me
Your body is not an ornament. It is a vessel.
Your life is not a foregone conclusion. It lives and breathes beneath your touch.
If you want to rebuild the chasm in your relationship with yourself so that you can feel seen, heard, + adored, no matter what – you are in the right place.
Personally and politically, I believe that all of us need and deserve to get our needs met.
I work with trans and cis women, femmes, and gender nonconforming, gender fluid, and non-binary folks assigned female at birth.
Beneath that glorious umbrella, I tend to work specifically with humans who identify with the perfectionism and people pleasing woven into the experience of growing up in a White supremacist, capitalist + patriarchal society, and who have been socialized to do emotional labor for everyone else but them.
I want you to know that you don’t have to do even more to earn the care you ache for by deliberately putting yourself at the top of your to do list.
I believe you are allowed to start again whenever you need to -- mid morning, mid-bite, or whenever the mood strikes.
This work isn’t about letting yourself off the hook or sinking into stagnation masquerading as self-acceptance.
This work is about rebuilding your trust, so that you are naturally able to find the sweet spot between honoring your capacity and holding yourself lovingly accountable to your desires.
Your needs are personal to you, but that doesn’t mean they are a huge mystery you have to spend forever figuring out.
Your deep tending requires that you choose yourself, again and again, even when choosing yourself feels impossible, rebellious, and selfish.
My work invites you to get to know, like + trust the person you are beneath the MANY roles you play each day through tangible daily action that prioritizes self-connection as you heal in good company with humans who getttttt itttttt.
ready to dive in?
Take this delightful quiz to get to the root of what you need right now – and receive my best resources for tending to your needs with care + compassion.
Read my book Needy: How to Advocate for Your Needs and Claim Your Sovereignty.
Dive in and take a class with me or join my yearlong community, Roost.
Tune in to the Needy podcast to listen to one of the most beloved episodes -- Real Self-Care & The Bigger Pitcher or Consistent Self-Care Vs. Emergency Self-Care.
Hang with me on Instagram for daily reminders of your innate enoughness.
giving back
Each and every person on this planet has needs.
However, it is difficult to meet your needs when you are struggling with immediate concerns of racism, homophobia, transphobia, hunger, fatphobia, human rights violations, ableism, and inadequate and unjust access to resources.
For this reason, 2% of the profits from my offerings are redistributed to organizations supporting humans who experience structural and systemic oppression on a daily basis. In addition, I offer scholarships for humans to take part in my work who would not otherwise be able to afford it.
Past recipients have included: Wôpanâak Language Reclamation Project, Whole/Self Liberation, Brooklyn Community Bail Fund, Essie Justice Group, No Kid Hungry, Southern Poverty Law Center, Women’s Earth Alliance, The Trevor Project, and Kids in Need of Defense.
Know of a non-profit that you would like to recommend to me for future support?
Please email me at mara@maraglatzel.com. I would love to hear from you.
xMara